By Tom Paxton
(From an idea furnished by Anne Hills)

John Ashcroft went to meet the press
He faced the microphones.
His heart was full of righteousness
His voice like God's trombones.
But then he saw the statue
That was set behind him there.
She was 'The Spirit of Justice'
Yes, but one of her breasts was bare.

John Ashcroft looked with horror
At this gleaming marble globe.
It thrust itself upon him
From a loosely falling robe.
It was so hard to concentrate
On those he there accused
With that marble breast behind him,
Poor John Ashcroft got confused.

Each time he saw that marble breast
The poor man was appalled,
He quickly gave the order
And a curtain was installed.
Now when he makes a statement
You can see him on the tube
He has curtained off the statue
But you'll still see one big boob.

©2002 Pax Music, ASCAP

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